I've been gone now for an extended period of time. I sincerely apologize...but honestly if I were to write to you during this time...it would have been sad...unentertaining...and lame. I didn't want to bore you...or for my hilarity to suffer because my mood has been perpetually sour the past few days. I think that it has been the most unfabulous week and half in the history of weeks. No worries though people...I'm starting to feel like myself again.
Today has been most uneventful...so what did I decide to do? Nap...hello? Do you know me at all? Well...as I was napping I was rudely awoken...not once....but twice by my twerpy 14 year old brother calling wanting to talk to me.(Man that sounded bitchy) Anyway...my baby brother is not exactly verbose when it comes to phone conversations...usually it's just to bug me and quote a retarded movie that we both find hilarious...today however, I knew he had something up his sleeve.
He knew that if he bugged me thoroughly that I would violently take my brain from sleep mode...to blog mode...so I could bitch about him waking me up. Very clever little brother...very clever...now not only have you a blog dedicated solely to your retardation...you have jolted me out of my unsarcassistic funk back into full blogging force. I applaud you. I'm sure my readers appreciate it.
So here I am...back to my old self...somewhat bitchy...but feeling utterly fabulous.
Do forgive me for my absence....blame Bruce Wayne ;)
I'm heading out...to take myself to a gourmet dinner...cooked by the executive chef himself at Taco Bell...don't be to jealous.
Over and Out,
B
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